Growing Love That Lasts a Lifetime
Tuesday, February 23, 2010 at 2:15PM 
Due to the positive response following the recent message series "Making Love Last for a Lifetime", and for those who have requested more help in the area of relationships, I have written down some of the teachings from the series, plus some extra help with each topic. A link is provided at the end of this material where it can be downloaded and printed in its entirety for easier usage. Review each topic, its basic truths, and then complete the assignments, including the scriptures for memorization. The key to realizing lasting and positive change in your relationships is the transforming power of the Holy Spirit. He will work through prayer, God's Word, and our efforts to transform us and fill our relationships with love that lasts a lifetime!
Section Three: Growing Love That Lasts a Lifetime
"Love....bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails."
1 Corinthians 13:7-8 (NKJV)
In the movie 'Fireproof', Caleb Holt's friend Michael Simmons makes the following statement: "Do you know what that ring on your finger means? It means that you made a lifelong covenant. The sad part about it is when most people say 'for better or for worse', they really only mean for the better."
I. Love 'Bears All Things'
The word 'bears' literally means 'to cover silently or protectively'. When our spouse or child makes a blunder we are faced with three choices:
- Express our disappointment to the point of demeaning their character and deflating their spirit.
- Belittle them for embarrassing us, thereby transferring your shame to them.
- Minimize their hurt, shame, embarrassment, and pain by lovingly protecting them and supporting them.
"And above all things have fervent love for one another, for love will cover a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8 (NKJV)
II. Love 'Believes All Things'
Love is always eager to believe the best. Love gives the benefit of the doubt.
“Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.” Philippians 4:8 (NKJV)
III. Love 'Hopes All Things'
We must embrace hope in our relationships! In 1 Corinthians 13:13 hope is linked to faith and love as the greatest Christian virtues. Hope allows us to love someone in the present while banking on a better future with them tomorrow.
“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28 (NKJV)
IV. Love 'Endures All Things'
This phrase literally means 'to remain under the load'. Take a look at the most common wedding vows:
- Love
- Honor
- Cherish
- Forsaking All Others
- Richer or Poorer
- Better or Worse
- Sickness and Health
- Until death do you Part
These vows are bristling with commitment. Love that lasts a lifetime means commitment. Commitment means you never leave your partner, especially in a fire.
Suggested Actions:
- PRAY - Pray for the strength of the Holy Spirit to confess all negative actions toward your spouse or children as SIN. Ask God to grow a greater love in you for your spouse. Choose one of the four attributes above and focus on it for a week.
- MEMORIZE - Memorize all of the Scriptures printed above. Saturate your mind with the Scriptures. Find additional verses to memorize that deal with sacrificial love, particularly Christ's love for the church that is the model for our marriage relationships.
- ACT - Choose one of the four attributes above and focus on it for a week. Share these truths with your spouse and tell them of your commitment to love them for the long haul.
Suggested Resources:
The 5 Love languages, by Dr. Gary Chapman. Northfield Publishing. ISBN - 0802473156.
This material in a downloadable file (Microsoft Word 1997-2003)
Christ, commitment, endurance, hope, love, truth in Making Love Last a Lifetime
BSFL Sunday School commentary for the week of May 9, 2010
"I Take You" Genesis 2; Malachi 2; Matthew 19
God's intention for marriage is lifetime commitment, because He knows our need for the security such a commitment brings. Genesis 2:23-25 is the very first recorded marriage vow. Adam publically declares that Eve is not just his wife, but she is also part of him. They are now one. That is God's intention for marriage from the very beginning. Today’s society glamorizes the wedding. By this, I mean to say that more time and energy is spent on the planning and choreography of the parties, showers, meals, and reception than on planning for marriage. God emphasizes the lifelong covenant.
According to scripture, a vow is a sacred promise or covenant between two or more people with God sealing the agreement. Marriage should start acknowledging that this is a special relationship between a man and a woman and that Christ should be the foundation and focus of this very special relationship. The purpose of marriage is to grow together physically, intimately, and spiritually.
Marriage is to be a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman with God sealing this vow, but today we often see marriage not so much as a covenant between man, woman, and God but more as a casual agreement that ends when the relationship is no longer fun or convenient. The idea of a vow that lasts until “death do us part” is rejected in today’s society, and the sad part is that the average Christian marriage has about the same chance of surviving as does a secular marriage. Divorce is the tearing apart of the foundation of all stable societies - the family. Sometimes, it is necessary; sometimes, it is unavoidable. Does the Bible permit divorce? Yes. Is it ever the best option? No.
According to scripture, only two occurrences warrant a divorce: if a spouse has been sexually immoral and is unwilling to repent (Matthew 19:8-9), or if a non-Christian spouse permanently deserts the Christian spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15). Even with these two scenarios, repeated attempts at reconciliation should be made. Divorce is always the last, and least desired option. It is permitted, but never promoted.
Christ takes the marriage vow very seriously — so seriously that He uses marriage to define His relationship with those who believe in Him. He demonstrated the ultimate vow by opening His arms wide on the cross with the thought in His head … “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”